You Are Who You Are For A Reason

Came across this little gem this morning and I couldn't agree or believe what it says any more then I do.  Enjoy:

You are who you are for a reason.
You're part of an intricate plan.
You're a precious and perfect unique design,
Called God's special woman or man.

You look like you look for a reason.
Our God made no mistake.
He knit you together within the womb,
You're just what he wanted to make.

The parents you had were the ones he chose,
And no matter how you may feel,
They were custom-designed with God's plan in mind,
And they bear the Master's seal.

No, that trauma you faced was not easy.
And God wept that it hurt you so;
But it was allowed to shape your heart
So that into his likeness you'd grow.

You are who you are for a reason,
You've been formed by the Master's rod.
You are who you are, beloved,
Because there is a God!

 - Russell Kelfer

Test

Just wondering who is out there... (my friend just did this on her blog and I like it)  let me know!

Giving/Expectaions

"Give With No Expectations"

"Expect Nothing From Everyone"

Two of my favorite little words of wisdom.

This is something I learned about 6 years ago - I mean learned like you have heard it said 900 times before but then one day someone says it and it just smacks you in the face and changes your life.

It really isn't a gift if there is an expectation there is it?  I don't give presents to people at holidays or birthdays because I am expecting something.  If I got no gifts at Christmas I wouldn't care - I love to get people gifts and I expect nothing in return.  I don't do nice things for people thinking, well now they owe me one.  When I buy someone lunch cause I want to, I am in no way thinking they owe me a lunch in the future or owe me anything.  And when I give money to a charity, church, man on the corner, etc - I don't care what they do with the money - I am giving it to them and it is theirs to decide what to do with.  If they waste it - that is not my concern I have given it to them and what they do with it is not my business because I do not put an expectation on the gift.

I know a lot of people who have exoectaions on gifts.  A lot of these people are probably not even aware that they have expectations - but they do.  Some people will buy you meals, take you fun places, and maybe instead of repaying a meal for a meal they expect more time from you, or preferential treatment, or a referral or sorts.  These people can be hard to spot...some are obvious, some are tricky.  These are the people that when we are out to eat or offer to pay for other things I never let them.  I'll go to great lengths never to let these people pay for anything for me - I don't want that hanging over my head that they think I "owe" them something.

If you in anyway have any expectation because of anything you are thinking about doing for me or giving me I say to you "Don't do, Don't give it to me".

I think when you put expectations on things you automatically are setting people up to fail.  I have learned this with family, friends, and especially in my marriage.  Here is an example.  Jared always takes out our trash now it would be easy for me to have an expectation that Jared is supposed to take out the trash.  Now let's look at the two options here:

1.  I Expect Jared to take out the trash:  

      a. when he does - he did his job

      b. when he doesn't - he's letting me down, he didn't do it again, come on Jared take out the TRASH!

2.  I don't expect Jared to take out the trash: 

     a. when he does - YAY THANKS Jared! You took out the trash!

     b. when he doesn't - oh shoot the trash still needs to go out, I'll do it 

When you don't expect it allows everything to be a blessing, an unexpected surprise, leaving a lot of disappointment and getting let down out of my life.  Unspoken expectations are the WORST.  A lot of Assuming is going on there which can only lead to problems.  Also, when you have these expectations you are putting a lot of pressure on someone else and they might have no idea any of this is happening in your head - then they are letting you down and they don't even know it.  Instead remove the expectations and let them surprise you, honor you, and do nice things for you - instead of just doing what they are supposed to do anyone. It's a whole mental shift - and I for one LOVE IT.

I ask myself this all the time: What unspoken or assumed expectations am I putting on other people?  Then I try to stop.  It's worked wonders in my life.

Again as a disclaimer - I'm sure my blog posts are going to wander all over and back again - but that's how I think so just go with it :0)

Honesty Disclaimer

I consider myself a pretty honest person.  I just don't see the point in being fake or not telling people like it is.  I don't believe in being rude to people there are some things that you should just keep to yourself, but if you ask my opinion about something you better be ready for my honest answer.

I started this blog to be like my journal, in a way, to write what I was feeling and just be myself, I keep finding myself not typing up something that I would like to because I know different people read this and I know that what I want to write would probably offend them or something - this has been making me feel dis-honest because then this blog really isn't about me and it's not my journal it's a half truth of me and it makes me feel weird.  So I have decided that I am just going to write what I want because after all this is my blog about me and my thoughts.  I am a firm believer that everyone is entitled to their own opinion and I am sure many people will not agree with what I say and that is just fine with me.  Frankly I'm glad - because isn't that the beauty of people and creation = we are all different!  Also, just because I may think differently about something then you doesn't mean I don't like you, or I think you are a bad person, or anything, I just don't think like you do on a certain topic.  I can't say whether you will think I am a bad person for thinking what I think but frankly...here comes honesty...I don't care.  If you think I am a bad person or wrong or whatever that is fine with me, you're entitled to your opinion - I really don't care.

So if you are offended by things, just don't read my blog anymore - but Life O Michelle is about my life and thoughts so HOLD ON this could get rocky - maybe not - I have no idea what future posts hold but consider this a fair warning.

Christmas!

Wow, the whirlwind of the holidays has just left us sitting in our house which is now a disaster area thinking of all the great memories that were made this holiday season and the past year.  In true Jared and Michelle fashion we forgot our camera just about the entire holiday season wherever we went.  Luckily my sister takes a lot of pictures so we were able to capture some of the moments!  We had a whopping 6 days in a row of Christmas Celebrations - and loved every minute of it.  I guess the nice thing about it that I love is that no where we go we don't have to get all dressed up and act all formal - it's all family, it's all comfortable and just a plain ol good time.

This was Tenley's first Christmas as you know and she had a great time.  She very much enjoyed seeing all the people every day and getting passed around and ooo'd and ahhhhh'd at constantly - she loves the spotlight.  This has is downfall now because today when Jared and I left her to play by herself which she usually does just fine, she keeps calling out "why is no one watching me!" so it will be a trying couple of days, but I'm sure she will get the jist that it's back to the old ways.

Tenley is getting more teeth which also makes whining more common then usual.  Tenley now loves to stand up while hanging onto a chair or toy or whatever you put her hands on. AND  drumroll please.....SHE FINALLY ROLLED OVER! (from her back to front - front to back she has been doing)  It was a Christmas miracle! haha.  She has only done it a few times, but at least she knows she can now.  She is eating like a champ still and very smiley and interactive.  She loves when people sing, bouncing on our legs, and "THE CLAW" coming at her to attack her.  She also loves talking and making weird sounds with her mouth that she likes people to make back to her.

Jared got a bunch of Tri stuff for Christmas and I got a little of everything.  Overall it was great to have Jared home from work for so long and hang out with the fam.

Here are some pics:

Getting our tree!

Decorating the Tree

Waiting to see Santa

Jared's AMAZING gingerbread house complete with Santa on the roof

First presents!

The Kids

Stockings!

Tenley got her first string to follow at my mom's (my favorite family tradition!)

Presents!

Relaxing at Grandma's

Grandpa

Pool Tournament Ultimate Loser

Aunt Erin & Emmett

Tenely got to FINALLY meet all the Up North relatives!

Ready to go Swimming at the Condo!

Sledding!

Hanging out

Family Pictures!

I've said it before and I'll say it again...Anne Jansen is an amazing photographer!  We were supposed to take these outside, but it was freezing and we didn't feel like having Tenley look like Rudolph in all the pics...we ended up with AMAZING pictures anyway!  Seriously if you need pics taken CALL HER!  I have her info if you need it!

6 Months - WARNING picture overload!

Tenley Update!
Well as you can guess by the title of this blog... TENLEY is 6 months old!! (as of yesterday)

• She is getting teeth on the bottom
• She sits up great for a LONG time by herself
• Rolling sometimes from front to back (not at all back to front- we're working on it)
• She is VERY smiley
• LOVES people watching 
• And said her first word........Dada. - she doesn't know what it means yet...so I'm not sure when people count it as their first word - is it when you can make out a sound that means something to us or when she knows what it is... we don't care we are marking it down as Dada!  Tenley and I have been working on it for a while so I was very proud when she said it as she was sitting with us on the couch yesterday!

Here are some pics for your enjoyment:

Holding hands :)

Hippi Maybe?  Dad trying to find the right bow

All smiles

Loves her Dada

Loves her new hat!

Loves Grandpas hat

Out to eat at El Burrito! YUMM

Thanksgiving Hair clip from Grandma

She's a Turkey

Hanging with her big cousin Tillman

cashed out

Hat from Grandma!

Doing her chores - taking Duke for a walk in the park

Hanging out with her cousin in their matching hats!  (notice the difference in leg think-ness haha)